Notice The Moment

A lot of personal development literature focuses on goal-setting and achieving. That's huge. It's the first step in living a great life.

But there's a flipside to goal-setting and achieving that is equally as important.

There is no point in getting something if you don't notice and appreciate it once it's there.

Gratitude is just on the other side of noticing what you have, and I will probably write about it at some point. However, it is pretty well-covered in rah-rah literature.

That leaves the middle step: noticing what you have.

It's scary how often I have wanted something, gotten it, and then complained that I never get what I want.

For instance, I am currently on a quest to connect with people as often as I can. And I still have the experience of spending all day with people I care about, then coming home and thinking, "How come I never get to connect with anybody?"

One of the scariest things for me is the idea of going from Point A to Point B and not noticing at all how I got there. This can be the achievement of a goal or the simple process of walking down the street.

Most of life is spent between those points. I don't want to spend that time in a fog, or lost in my own head. I want to see what is around me, really see it.

One of my earliest techniques was to "see the trees". It's not the key to happiness, but you do see the world in a different way.

When you are walking down the street, just focus on a tree (or a pillar of cement, or a person standing still). Put everything else in the background.

Learn to focus on the world as a series of individual pieces rather than a big Jackson Pollack painting. Then switch back and forth. At the very least, you will exist in the moment and see what is in front of you.

My next technique is to STOP myself on the street, look up, look around, and ask myself, "Am I alive?" It sounds obvious, but it never hurts to remind myself of that.

The world honestly looks different in that moment. It's a world I wish I saw more often.

Then, I ask myself, "What is beautiful about this moment?" If you want to be less of a sap, just change the adjective: What is cool? What is inspiring? What is funny?

After doing this, I notice how little I have been noticing the world around me. I realize how much I have been wasting my life and ignoring the gifts flying past my face. And I start to notice until the next time my brain shuts off.

Finally, I use my own variation on a trick that Barbara DeAngelis calls "Real Moments". Her formula is "Conscious, Connect, Surrender."

I never really figured out what that means, but I've gotten it to work for me.

Conscious: Blink. Look around. Look at your arms, your shoes, the tip of your nose. Look at the world around you.

Connect: Focus on the people you are with, or just the strangers immediately around you. Really look at them and notice who they are and why it's great that they are there.

Surrender: Now embrace the Jackson Pollack painting. Take all of the individual elements you've identified, and let them flow at you, attack you, wash over you. Blur your eyes and pretend you are in one of those 2001 space-warps.

When this is done, you will notice the world around you. You will notice how little you had been noticing before. And hopefully you will want to notice your world more often.

Without this, I don't see much point in accomplishing anything, or even existing from moment to moment.

It's great for walking down the street, but it's better during the moments when you are achieving something you've waited forever to achieve.

It's cheesy, but when I am kissing a beautiful girl - certainly a moment I strive towards in life - I take one second to open my eyes, think "fucking awesome - I'm here", and then lose myself again. Sometimes that one moment is enough.

Put yourself absolutely in the moment, because it is the moment you've worked towards. Or maybe it is just one of many fleeting moments in your life. Don't let any of them slip by in a haze.